Relationship advice: How to spend private time with your spouse after a baby is born
This article is full of tips for finding some romantic time after the baby. It’s not easy but it can be done.
Finding time to spend with your spouse might be difficult, it will be next to impossible after the baby if you don’t make it a priority. Although meeting your guy at the door covered in plastic wrap sounds romantic, how many of us have done it? I think most of us are under the impression that “spending time”, means setting hours aside and getting a sitter. This doesn’t have to be the case, take advantage of every nap and play date.
If you’re a morning person, wake up 20 minutes early and cuddle with your spouse before tackling the day. Yes, there are a hundred things you could be doing while she is napping but how does a bath with your spouse sound? Don’t feel guilty for laying down during the day you are working, on your relationship. If you have a pool, bring the monitor out and take a dip. This is a great rejuvenator because there are no distractions for either of you. A good way to sneak a little time is to get an educational video from the library. On the weekend you can let her watch her “special” show while you both make dinner. His help with such a task will make you feel more appreciated which will help later on in the evening.
If you and your spouse are the outdoor type you can pick up an inexpensive tent or rent a camper. After the baby’s asleep theirs is nothing but a fire and marshmallows, an excellent way to reconnect. Camping is also nice because you do things you don’t have time for at home. You can walk up to the playground together and talk for hours while she crawls around and watches the other children. If you have a beach or state park in the area, these are great places for a picnic. Yes, a picnic I know it sounds corny but like I said it’s work and it won’t get done unless you take advantage of every small amount of time you can get. Bring along a toddler friend, older children love to feel more adult while entertaining a baby. While she is singing Itsy Bitsy Spider for the tenth time you and your spouse could be eating shrimp cocktail under a tree nearby.
If you would like to go all out, get tickets to a show. The tickets are good because you feel like you have to go. Chances are when you drop her off at grandmas you really want to go home and take a nap. A show and room for the night will help you remember what life was like when you first got married. One piece of advice, have the sitter come about an hour early. There is nothing like sitting in a fancy restaurant with a wet ponytail and milk on your shoulder.
As cliché as it sounds most successful couples have some sort of pastime that keeps the fire burning. This could be anything from backrubs before bed to golf on the weekend. The key to this is to do it even when you don’t want to. Yes, you want to go right to sleep but exchanging backrubs can be a great time to go over your day together. Chances are you will be conscience of baby weight so maybe the two of you could go for a hike while she is at a play date. If you know another couple with a baby, take turns having sleepovers and linger over breakfast before picking her up.
It is important not to feel pressured while you are together a rule like “No talking about the kids” will most likely be broken and that’s ok she is a huge part of your life now. Who wants the feeling of disappointment when discussing your pride and joy. Try to remember at the same time that other things are going on. If you stay at home with your children make sure to watch the news day, current events are sure to charge any conversation. Write down jokes you hear or something new you notice in the neighborhood. When dating your husband you are now trying to find some level ground between mom and woman. Keep in mind what brought you together and remember that no matter how different your views, you are working for the same team. Enjoy each other!